Obama brings out the worst in people

As you know, we are huge Obama fans around our house. The "race" speech has convinced me of so many things...

But, it apparently does not bring out the best in others.

For the election, Ryan went to the Obama headquarters and purchased a yard sign for the front yard. We put it out there and enjoyed it until J's birthday when my parents came to visit and absconded with it. Dad claims that telling us afterward that it was in his trunk makes it ok, but this isn't about that.

Mom and Dad took the sign to Canmore, Alberta (where they are "snowbirds who got lost and stayed too long"ing this winter) and put it in the front yard of their house. It looks like it was tough to spot in all the snow!

Earlier this week the sign was liberated from their yard too. This wasn't a real surprise as Obama signs are probably hard to come by in Canmore, but still a shame.

Mom went onto this website and bought two more signs (two for her and one to replace ours) and a bumper sticker and had them mailed to us here in Austin. They arrived yesterday and sat on our front porch until we got home from work and retrieved them. Something about this box (perhaps that it was mostly falling apart and on the front porch un-attended) gave someone the idea to poke around in it. So when we got home it was opened and the bumper sticker is missing.

Sigh, he's the candidate of "hope", right? Guess people don't equate that to personal property.

Time Change Nightmare

Who decided the time change was a good idea?

We are asking kids to go to sleep when the sun is still up and wake up before the sun gets up... all so retailers can make a few extra bucks? It is nice to have some time at the end of the day where the sun is still up so we can have dinner on the porch, but I don't think it was necessary to move it up a few weeks so that we are all getting up in the dark.

Now I have kids who won't go to bed AND don't want to get up.

Small World

I am always amazed at how small a world it is.

Austin is a really small world where you run into people from other areas of your life unexpectedly, but it really isn't that big to begin with. Especially when you hang out with similar people (IT or Lawyers). Similar experiences, similar interests.

Where I get amazed are the people I run into who have lived in far flung places just like me. At J's allergy appointment last week I was talking to the Dr about having grown up in different places and it turned out that she went to the same american elementary school in London I did. ACS Hillingdon. She also lived in Jakarta and went to the American school there while we were at the Singapore American School. Her dad worked for Conoco, so we ran in the same circles, but it's still a shock to run into these people.

Don't take stock advice from me

This image is a great example of why no one should take advice from me when it comes to spending money on something that has a "Market".

This graph represents the cost of tickets to go to the beach this summer. I have been watching these tickets for months now, knowing that I was going, and I kept watching. You can see by the jump and fall of the price earlier that I should have learned that NOW is a good time to buy. And then our friends who are also going all bought theirs last week. But did I buy? no. Did I think they might go down again? Of course I did. Even though I saw an article in the paper which said "ticket prices to go up with increased fuel costs".

So, now I will wait some more because it will cost me an additional $400 because I am an idiot.

Weekend Drama

It was a great weekend. We had our friend Lauren in from North Carolina with her son N. All the boys played nicely, even worked out sleeping with all three of them in the same room (good practice for our trip to the beach this summer!).

The Drama this weekend was a trip to the emergency room to get P's chin glued back together. He was leaning back in a dining chair and went all the way back and (somehow, not really sure) cut his chin open about an inch from side to side. There was surprisingly little blood and he was in a great mood while we were at the emergency room (which made our visit much longer since he wasn't in distress, infuriatingly so).

But all is well, he is thrilled that the glue they used was purple and he hasn't complained about it once.

No wonder you're in a bad mood!

It took us a long time to come to the conclusion that J isn't a "difficult" child. All signs pointed to us having a kid with issues. Now, he's a great kid and he's smart and interesting and gets along with adults and kids in a regular kind of 6 year old way... but he is a challenge when it comes to his emotions. He is prone to bursting into tears at the least provocation, like "please pick up your shirt" led to crying and histrionics of massive proportions.

So Ryan and I have spent countless hours worrying, reading, talking to teachers... ok, mostly the hours were spent throwing our hands in the air and declaring defeat in the eyes of this beast. We didn't know how to handle it let alone address it. We did try time and again the tricks we had in our bag. Patience, talking, time outs, reasoning, explaining, lack of patience, bribes. All of it seemed to have no impact. He understood, we talked it through, but in the end his emotions always got the better of him. As time passed, we prayed that it would pass too as he matured.

When we got to Austin he started Kindergarten and we were both hoping that he was up to the challenge. It's tougher to be in a bigger class with only one teacher who has a stricter agenda (must teach to the (eventual) test!). It was interesting to see J's teacher struggle with the same things we did. The teacher conference was educational as they were at that stage of remaining hope that we had hung around for a while. "It's just the age" they assured us. "Lots of boys are like this".

Then we turned a corner into the dark time in J's Kindergarten career. He started to get in trouble a lot more. The exasperation in the teacher's voice when we spoke was more and more clear. They moved into the "frustration & exasperation" phase ("welcome", I thought to myself, "see, it's not just me").

Just as Christmas was looming I started to seriously consider counseling. And then an unexpected thing happened. We got a Christmas tree.

A few hours after the tree was in the house, P started sneezing and scratching at his eyes, runny nose, the whole thing. I gave him some Claratin and considered getting rid of the tree. In the morning he was better but still had symptoms. I decided the tree could stay, but that he was just going to have to have allergy meds through the holiday season. As I was giving P his tiny white pill, J asked if he could have one too. Since they had both have had the same allergies at the same time in the past (and our pediatrician told me that Claratin is a very benign drug) I gave J one too. For the next week J & P got Claratin and things started to change. J listened better and had much more appropriate responses. He was able to deal with his issues in a much more rational manner. When we went back to school after the break, his teacher even asked what was different and if we had changed something. I began to realize that the allergies were impacting his ability to concentrate and deal with things emotionally.

So fast forward to today. We had J tested for allergies yesterday. The specialist says that he has spring allergies to things like Oak and Pecan pollens, and he has year round allergies to dust and... Dog. We talked about strategies, allergy shots, meds, etc. The sum of the conversation was... you have a dog, your son has dog allergies, good luck with that!

So, now we know. J started his allergy meds again this morning (after a week off and the teacher asked me "When does Joe start his medicine again?").

In two weeks P is having his skin tests as he's starting to get testy too. He's probably allergic to tulle and glitter.

Somebody should...

About a year ago when green-ness was becoming in vogue I wondered how green I was and how I could find out more about becoming more green. Thoughts like this usually lead to me dreaming up some new software application to answer my ponderings, not actually doing anything to take Action on the problem... but enough about me...

Here's one (of many I am sure) site that answers the question I was asking. Knowing what car I drive and what lightbulbs I choose to light my home with, what is my impact on the environment and if I choose to change my lightbulbs or car or whatever, what impact can I make?

Low Impact Living

F@#k You Nina Totenburg!

It was a big day in the Bates household. Ryan went to DC on Saturday to attend the hearings for his first case as a "real" lawyer and it was a biggie! He is on the "less rights for the indigent" side of Rothgary v. Gillespie County that was heard in front of THE Supreme Court. (Some friends assumed it was a Texas Supreme Court case, just to be clear...).

So, all day I was watching The Volokh Conspiracy and the New York Times and other sites to see if there was any interesting reporting about it. Ryan had called in the morning and said he was "going dark" for a few hours (they can't take electronics into the courthouse), so I was all a twitter. My co-workers undoubtedly rolled their eyes when I posted that he was there and his case was being heard (get back to requirements analysis already!).

Then came the drive home. I love Nina Totenburg on NPR. Her soothing radio voice and "break it down for the masses" writing style is great for a girl like me who's breadth of legal knowledge is wholly encompassed by Law and Order. I was so looking forward to hearing about Rothgary v. Gillespie County and the pivotal fight to determine when you actually get a lawyer when "you have the right to an attorney".

An aside here. Ryan was in the midst of writing his brief for the court and asked me some "as a citizen with little or no legal knowledge" questions pertaining to his case. I like to think I helped him out by being so blase about my understanding of legal representation. (I'd like to note, that when Ryan decided he wanted to go to Law school, I figured I would "lawyer up" at the slightest provocation or even an illegal hang-nail... he's free, so why not?)

So, hoping my 20 minute drive would coincide with ms. totenburg's summary of my hubbie's legal career, I jumped in the car to get the kids. Minutes later... there she was! Woo hoo! Lay it on me sister, explain to me what has engrossed my husband for night after night and was the cause of my mad rush across town to pick up both boys before the day care starts charging by the minute!

Nina then tells some very boring story about how Fox Broadcasting is appealing some draconian implementation of the "7 dirty words" law. And how they want to overturn.. blah blah blah. The salacious information in the report was that it was about the usage of the F word and S word on live broadcasts. And Cher and Nicole Richie's poor choice of public language was causing a multi-billion dollar company to shell out a few bucks. While I believe this issue is mostly ridiculous on both sides (Nicole Richie is setting policy? v. Who the hell cares?), I was especially outraged when Nina wrapped up her reporting with nary a mention of when your right to legal council attaches! That bitch!

Well, I can't really change her reporting, but I am anxiously waiting for the Volokh Conspiracy to post their analysis (as promised). By way of compensation, perhaps if the Democratic primary election could come down to some sort of legal battle (with Obama winning in the end, of course), that would make up for this slight. That would make my hubby happy.

Cross Dressing 3 year old makes a Girl out of Mom!

The other day I was dropping P off at school and he ran up to his teacher and exclaimed in delight at her skirt. He was so thrilled by it he was giddy. Then last weekend I took him shopping with me to get some work staples (nice shirts and jeans, thank god I work in high tech) and he not only made me try on this flirty embroidered dress, but begged me to buy it.

So I began to wonder about his disappointment at having an Everyday Dora for a mommy (practical hair, pants all the time, prepared for anything with trusty backpack) rather than the pink-ed up princess with the floaty dress and bad hair extensions. How disappointed he must be when I appear each morning and I don't look like Doris Day.

So today, consciously or not, I choose the pink purse and matching pink wallet at Target when I was buying my twice yearly effort at accessorizing. I choose a nice shade of purple for my toes the last time I got a pedicure. I have been trying harder to do the hair and face in a purposeful way.

He won't ever have the incredibly put-together mommy of his dreams, but I can try and meet him half way. Then some day I can point out that although I don't have matching purse and shoes, I can help him rewire his house, and then maybe he'll thank me.

6 month doldrums

Moving as much as Ryan and I have, you would think we would have it down cold. But each time the same thing surprises me...About 6 months after you have arrived at your new location, things start to suck.

Things can be anything from having a terrible weekend to an hour long 7am conference with all THREE teachers AND the director of the day care.

And then it hits me (it hit Ryan this time, he had to remind me)... 6 month doldrums. It's the time where you have stopped focusing on the house (all unpacked!), stopped concentrating on making new friends or catching up with old ones, stopped finding new restaurants and start going to the same ones, stopped going on weekend trips to explore your new city. Now you really live there, you're not on some all-expense-paid-extended-working-holiday.

You start wondering if this is really the place for you... Maybe X city isn't so great because you gave it a shot and things just didn't work out. This is the time when if you really have the itch you start looking around. Perhaps back to someplace you know more people or the weather is better or whatever. So you take some steps to change your situation. Some months pass, plans are made to leave and then whamo! you start to feel at home.

I am having a 6 month doldrums week/month. Feeling like a fish out of water.

Unlike Denver, I know that I love Austin and we aren't bailing on this place anytime soon. The day will come in a while when I feel at home. In the mean time, thanks Ryan for putting a name on my unexplained melancholy.

35mm photos now digital!

I had just unpacked two boxes which had been moved many many times without being opened that were full of pictures. My goal at the time I opened them was to go through the pictures and put them in photo books to preserve the memories (before I forgot who's who, when we went where). I have boxes and boxes of prints and Advantix 35mm film, and merely taking them out of the Costco envelopes was an accomplishment which was celebrated with much fanfare around my house...

Then two things happened... For Christmas I decided to make photo books to share with family about our crazy last year (Denver! Snow! Moving to Austin! Austin! etc. ). I had a really pleasant experience with Snapfish and I wanted to make more!!! Second, I read Ben Brumfield shared this article about going through your old photos and the throwing away things your don't really need, but also scanning your 35mm negatives and realized that I was limited in making more photo books about the past because my photos were more and more on 35mm. So... after much research online about scanning services (most run about $0.40 per image ~ $10 per roll, yikes!) which seemed a bit high when faced with at least 40 rolls without even opening up those OTHER boxes.

One problem I found online was that services which would scan your negatives cheaply won't do it to already processed film. They wanted to do the processing and then scan it for your for a few bucks. All my film is processed, so that wouldn't work.

Then I went to Costco. They have the same "let us scan your 35 mm when we process it" service, but they are more than happy to scan already processed film as well! For $3! They did my first roll in an hour while I shopped!

So I took a large handful of their processing envelopes and sat watching tv one night and filled out one envelope per roll and took it in one Saturday. They smiled when I handed them my bag and said it would be ready by the following Saturday. They called 2 days later to say it was ready!

The images are larger than the pictures from our new digital camera and look great! Now I have loaded all the images into my Picasa albums, added (likely) dates and locations for the pictures. Now I am ready to create ~30 page books for each year since Ryan and I met... just waiting on a sale at Snapfish (I hear Costco has a deal with them or Shutterfly on these photo books, maybe this is worth checking out next!)

Compromise and a Miracle occurs

We had a miraculous break through this weekend.

J has been a tough nut to crack when it comes to compromise. Each time Ryan and I tried to come to some middle ground, the mere mention of him not getting everything that he wants sends him into tears.

It may sound like I am exaggerating, but almost every conversation about it went like this:
"J, we don't have time to play a game before dinner, how about we play half a game and finish it after dinner?"
"Nooooooo! I wanted to play NOW!"
"But we can play now, we'll just have to wait to finish later"
"NOOOOO! I wanted to play NOW! That's not fair!"
"Would you rather we not play at all?"
"NOOOOOOOOO, I wanted to play NOW!"

This weekend, Ryan explained compromise to him (not that we haven't explained it to him many times before). It seems to have sunk in. Here comes the miracle...

For dinner, we decided on Pasta with Chicken. Pasta is a Freak Out Food for J. Even the mention of it as an item OTHERS are having sends him over the top. So I decided to use our new tool. I went to him as dinner was cooking and explained that we were having Pasta. He started to get upset, so I explained that I knew he didn't love pasta, so could we compromise? I asked him if he would like to have half of the pasta dish.. the pasta or the sauce? (He is a sauce-0-phobe, so I knew the answer to this one). He chose the pasta. I asked if we could compromise by me putting some butter and Parmesan cheese on it. He agreed that would be ok.

When we sat down to dinner, he had a small bowl of Penne with butter and Parmesan, he ate it up (he ate it FIRST!). I was so shocked and proud and exhausted (that may be the cold...) I even took a picture. I tried not to make a big thing of it, but this was a really big day.

Yeah turning 6!

It's Pajama Day!

It's Pajama Day at P's school. He has been talking about it for a week. All day in your pajamas, it does sound appealing.

Although, it's not what adults think of as spending the day in your jammies... sleeping late, browsing the Internet, watching Oprah, drinking hot cocoa (it's a cold day here in Austin...).

P's wearing jammies all day is more like... getting up, taking a shower, doing your hair and makeup, putting on a fresh pair of jammies and driving to the office for a long day of work (where everyone else is in jammies too), then going home, having dinner with the family, changing into fresh jammies, brushing teeth and going to bed.

Put that way, I am not so sure it sounds so appealing.

UT Basketball Game

J and Ryan went to the UT Basketball game last night against Nebraska. They had a good time, enjoyed the hooting and hollering, ate hot dogs, even sat with a friend from school who happened to be sitting near by.

Ryan said the best part of the night was when they were watching Bevo (the Longhorn mascot) run around.

J said "Don't you think all these (Nebraska) Red Shirts would make him mad?"

Indeed.

Star Wars Birthday Success!

J turns 6 tomorrow (hard to believe) and we had his birthday party on Sunday. It was a weird Austin-in-winter day where it looked like rain but only sprinkled a few times, while being over 70 degrees so we had to have the AC on in the house...

We got a moonwalk with a slide in it as the main form of entertainment. Happily the house has a great side yard that accomodated the giant blow up structure nicely. Only one piece of drama: the installer came right as we were finishing cleaning up the yard and set it up. It had two blowers so we ran one extention cord into the living room (front of the house) and the second to the back porch. Ryan was out watching J and P jump before everyone arrived. We had agreed to have some "quiet time" before everyone got there, so they were coming in. Ryan comes into the house and I see the house deflating...

"Oh, you unplugged it until everyone gets here?"

"What do you mean?"

Yells from the back yard "Mom, Dad, Help!"

We had blown the circuit breaker with the kids in it!
They were rescued, we moved one extention cord and we were fine for the rest of the day.

One nice moment in the whole party prep process... J actually pitched in. He began the process with a very self-involved attitude about how he didn't have to help, but we had a chat about how it's a lot of work to get ready to have a great time, and then he was on board. He gathered all the laundry baskets and helped sweep the floors, all without a word of complaint (miracle!).

The other big hit was the cake. It was a bit of effort on my part, but it was all worth it when J walked around the whole party telling everyone what a wonderful job I had done and how he thought it was "the best cake Mom has ever made". It's nice to see him grow into more adult emotions.

As we like to say "May the Fork be with you... use the Fork!"