Friday, June 27, 2003

Chairman of the Dog

(From my other blog, chairmanofthedog)

Now I know what my boss felt like when he laid me off.
"It's not you, it's that the company is going bankrupt, we have to let some people go before it implodes!".

Now I know what it feels like to know that you are going to fire someone, yet they don't know.
Are you nicer to them? Do you treat them meanly so the separation won't be such a shock? Everything you do in those last few weeks will be analyzed for clues of "did they know?" It is a terrible situation on both sides.

Now I know, because I had to let my dog go... I am Chairman of the Dog.

Lucy had the unfortunate timing of being hired on right before the crash in our company called The Family. Stocks were riding high, there was huge potential for growth. Both CEO's were increasing the value of the company. There was time for work (sleep during the day) and play (all the attention Lucy wanted after work). It was a great work environment, 1 square a day, a deck to lie on, a yard to run in, everything a dog employee could want, plus options!

Then everything started to change.

The Chairmen started to focus their attention other things. There wasn't time for Lucy anymore as curtains were made for a new hire to the company. "Pat" (baby to be named J. later) was expected to make a big splash in the company. Lucy was old news.

Unfortunately, there was competition for affections even before "the rookie" announced his intentions to join the company. Maggie, the older employee who had initially shown Lucy the ropes, was starting to butt in on attention getting sessions that Lucy enjoyed. There began a series of retaliations between them, until any time inside was a big wrestling session and they were both reprimanded (and thrown out).

The Rookie was another blow to Lucy's postion. This kid had the nerve to not only demand attention all day, but ALL NIGHT too! And not once was there a "hush" sent his way. It was as if he were different, better somehow.

Then came the time that the Board decided that something had to give. There were just too many employees. Unfortunately for Maggie and Lucy, the Rookie, or "golden child" as they began to call him , was never on the chopping block. There was some grumbling about "second class citizens", which, in retrospect was totally true. Was it Maggie or Lucy who had to go? Through no real sense of logic, we chose to go with the dog with more tenure. Lucy was fired. But, she didn't know it yet...

For months we asked our friends if they needed to add someone to their company. Eventually, a friend's parents offered to take Lucy on. There was some discussion of "trial periods" etc, but as J. was taking more and more time in his "training period", it was best if we found Lucy a permanent position. Eventually, our friend's parents agreed to take Lucy. After they took a trip. For a month.

So now you see my position. I know Lucy is going, Lucy is totally clueless. I tell myself she will be better off in her new postion, but I know I am just trying to make myself feel better. So I start to give her extra treats. I give her extra pats on the head. I even give her an extra scoop of kibble some days.

Happily, I can honestly say that she got the better end of the bargain. If Lucy had email, she would be telling Maggie how she gets to eat as much as she wants all day with a big bowl of food constantly full (and 20 extra lbs to show for it...). She has a new friend that she gets to be the big sister to, there is both a swimming pool AND a stream to swim in, cows to chase, a vineyard to guard, and, Dennis the Menace style, an ornery old neighbor to avoid.
Maggie got shafted, but she's finally vested those options.

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